I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
