Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
