It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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