NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
