where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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