Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
