Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
