i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
