this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I didn't notice because vodka
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I AM VODKA MAN
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
