There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
