Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
