hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
