'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize