I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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