I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize