we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
