i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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