I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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