Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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