i don't like sucking hair
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
