Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
