I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
