i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
