I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Do vagina's smell?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
