Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
