you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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