i think my mom watched the whole time
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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