Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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