He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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