why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize