How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
