Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just blew my weed a kiss
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
