Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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