Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
