summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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