Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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