OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
