guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
