We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
