It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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