I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
