She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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