we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
