it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
