First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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