the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
