508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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