She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
How external is "for external use only"?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
