i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
