I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
